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Mental Health

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  I'd like to talk about my struggles with mental health, but I'm worried I might be a burden to the people around me. What should I do?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  Hi there!
  There is a popular which says " The truth will set you free " it can be very difficult for you to discuss your mental condition with your family. Your reason be might be fear of shame or rejection, but in a journey of healing you will need a support group. If you are not comfortable discussing it with family. Telling a close or trusted friend can be considered at least for the meantime and when you are most ready please let them know. Family is still family. Pray for strength and enlightenment.

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  Sometimes it only takes a stranger, in a dark place… to make us warm in the coldest season
  • alfred76  

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  That is simply gorgeous and gorgeously simple! May we all be the source of warmth for one another. May others' warm gestures towards us never escape us. Thank you for sharing @alfred76

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  Can We Get Together To Eliminate Isolation ?
  • praiseehyehiesous  

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  @praiseehyehiesous Hi, thank you for your question. I'm wondering if @thetapestryproject-sg can help on this. Besides being an independent, not-for-profit online publication that champions mental health recovery through the power of first-person stories, they also have a community of people who have shared their personal journeys.

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  I just had a meltdown and/or episode in public. How should I deal with its aftermath? And what can I say to my friends or acquaintances who witnessed it?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  @thetapestryproject-sg I have outbursts in public too but I just move on because I believe I am in the right and if you know you are in the right , you don't have to be ashamed of yourself
  Anyway my email is ocean33388@yahoo.com and you can share your story with me , I don't mind meeting up because I am also living in isolation due to my condition
  Just feel free to drop me a message

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  What can employers and supervisors do to support a team member or new employee who has a mental health condition?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  Educating the whole staff about mental illness would be a good first step. And not just how to recognise it, but provide concrete ways each employee can take to look out for one another's mental well-being. Destigmatisation in the work place starts there.

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  Some people believe that having a strong will is enough to overcome a mental health condition. How true is this in your experience?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  @ho-shuhuang When you don't feel like doing anything at all, a small step makes all the difference. Thank you for reminding me of this today.

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  What books and movies would you recommend when it comes to understanding more about mental health?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  @amaliaariffin Thanks for this book recommendation! Have not heard of it till now. Will check it out!

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  Frequent suicidal thoughts...?
  • lynnchan  

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  @ms-chellelai Thanks so much for sharing your personal experience with us. It must have been a distressing time for you to have gone through so much and to come so close to suicide. The fact that you're still here today is testament to your strength, and for that we just want to say we're proud of you and we're glad you're still with us

  That's such an interesting point you brought up on how suicidal thoughts were expressed by "neurotypicals" and the possibility of them taking the option of euthanasia should it be legalised. It kinda makes one worry - how a person can reach that point so quickly and whether it was a genuine need masked by humour or flippant statements. It just goes to show that suicide is a real urgent issue that occurs under stressful situations without the factor of mental illness.

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  What happens if the mental health professional we're seeing is not suitable?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  @ho-shuhuang Excellent pointers. Thanks for the elaboration! Yes, it's true that our conditions sometimes colour the way we communicate our needs or even limit our ability to articulate what we want. Sounds like it takes some level of self-awareness too! Journalling is probably a good starting point to help one work "backwards" as you've said, and to explore what one needs and what sort of reasons justify the decision to switch medical professionals. Life is too short to be "paiseh" in getting the help we deserve!

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  How do we help someone if we ourselves are so drained?
  • ourbetterworld  

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  @ourbetterworld I don’t think we can do much then. Therefore, self-care is important.
  However, we can always guide the person to someone who can give him/her a helping hand.

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  What is resilience? Is it something we are born with?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  While we can wield our might to be as strong and as resilient as we can be, some people need that extra nudge to build their resilience. For instance, if one grows up in a household where his parents are verbally abusive, it might take him a lot more effort to fight his inner demons (i.e. being self-critical, low self-esteem, etc.) than someone who's confident having grown up in a health household.

  Of course, like what @maitatoy has mentioend - resilience is a muscle that we need to flex! It's just that we have to acknowledge some people are born to be more athletic than others.

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  Is a diagnosis absolutely necessary? Why and why not?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  Thanks for your input @ho-shuhuang. Yes a diagnosis certainly is like a double-edged sword! A diagnosis is something that can serve as a useful starting point, and we reckon that shouldn't be the final goal or determining factor in our daily living. In many ways, stigma happens when people misuse the "label" and see it as a be all and end all, instead of seeing that there is life beyond the definitions of a disorder.

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  We talked a lot about helping youth and helping our children. But does anyone have advice on how we can help our parents?
  • ourbetterworld  

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  Hi @eelinong, excellent question! From what we know so far, aside from the usual community help resources (https://thetapestryproject.sg/get-help-resources), there are groups within hospitals like KKH that offer support for parenting related challenges like post-partum depression - a condition that occurs in both women and men. There are also family service centres available for parents that are finding it hard to cope with the day-to-day demands of raising a family.

  NCSS also has a comprehensive list of mental health services open for the public (https://www.ncss.gov.sg/Press-Room/Publications/Detail-Page?id=Mental-Health-Resource-Directory) here are some resources that you can consider:

  ComCare by Ministry of Social and Family Development - For low-income individuals and families who may require any form of social assistance which includes financial assistance

  Helpline by Clarity Singapore Limited - Provides emotional support for individuals experiencing stress, anxiety, anger and depression

  Support for Wellness Achievement Programme (SWAP) Hotline by Institute of Mental Health - Provides emotional support for individuals experiencing or at-risk of developing psychosis or other mental illnesses.

  Yuan Yuan Helpline (Mandarin) by Shan You - Offers service to individuals facing bereavement, critical illness, unexpected challenges in their lives or who may just need a listening ear.

  Insight Centre Service Provider by Singapore Association for Mental Health - A community-based programme that specialises in working with
  persons with mental health issues and their caregivers.

  Hope this helps!

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  Under what circumstances would you raise or discuss your mental health?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  No one has replied

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  What should we do when a friend or family members tells us they are feeling suicidal?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  What is recovery to you?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  Recovery to us is less a goal and more a healthy state of mind. Think about what a happy day looks like; recovery to us is just about having more good than bad days.

  This is not to say that bad days will never happen again. However, building mental resilience means we can identify our bad days and have positive strategies and good habits to get us through these tough times! Recovery is also accepting that we deserve all our good days as the norm.

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  Imagine you are experiencing symptoms of fatigue, low mood, insomnia and irritability - how do you decide if this is something serious?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  @Sharon-Lok thanks for the great tip on using apps! Aside from the period tracker, one of the apps we've come across is Dailyo, which lets us to rate our moods daily and record our activities. Pretty useful for people who prefer a more pictorial way of recording their moods! There's also Mood Panda which is similar but has a social function to it - it lets users publish their struggles publicly and receive "hugs" from those in the same thread/channel.

  If a person is not into apps, journaling and writing are also good ways to becoming more aware of their emotions. Simple things such as listing their symptoms as bullet points, or laying them out in a table really goes a long way in tangibly monitoring their moods across a period (or periods) of time.

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  How to be inclusive in mental health?
  • ourbetterworld  

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  What a great question! Inclusivity is a dynamic concept, but often means accepting and involving a person in any activity or decision without discriminating against them. An example of this would be hiring based on merit rather than other identity factors (gender, race, mental health, etc.)

  Another approach would be about "choice" - does the person have a say in making certain decisions, or are the decisions being made for the person? For example, the very act of being consulted for your opinion before a decision is made is a good indicator of a healthy and inclusive working environment!

  There are probably many ways to practice and show inclusion. What do you think?

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  Loneliness
  • Warmanadarsh2504  

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  @Warmanadarsh2504 It sounds like you're going through a tough time finding someone to hear you out. We're sorry that you're going through this right now... Loneliness can be a crippling and overwhelming emotional state to be in. We can't specifically advise you on how to improve your relationship with your friends or family, but there are others who are willing to talk with you through these difficult times. Perhaps consider speaking with a counsellor? There are a number of mental health helplines which @maitatoy has provided. Some of them are free. You're never alone, and help is available. You can even remain anonymous for some of these services. We hope you'll feel better after speaking to someone who is trained and who would also talk to you without judging. Sometimes loneliness can be our friend. It allows us to be still in this noisy world, and from that we develop greater strength and resilience.

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  Relapse is a real and much dreaded possibility for people in recovery. Is it preventable and how should we help ourselves and others when relapse happens?
  • thetapestryproject.sg  

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  H

  I think it's helpful to see a mental health condition as a chronic condition not unlike diabetes. I personally believe an absolute cure does not exist but the condition can be well-managed. In other words, if we don't take the necessary steps to take care of ourselves, we will invariable relapse. It's not a matter of if, but when.

  Preventing that involves several things. If medication works, then it must be taken regularly and consistently, even if things appear to get better. That's not to say one must be on medication for life. If an individual chooses to go medication-free, or if medication doesn't work, then self-care must be prioritised. This includes understanding one's triggers and environmental circumstances which could lead to a relapse. It's hard to generalise across all mental health conditions, but I've found the more you understand of your condition, the more you accept it as part of who you are, the more you'll know what to do to prevent a relapse, and the greater the confidence you'll have to actually do these things. Sadly, we often know what we should do but we don't have the guts to stand up for ourselves.